Maybelline SuperStay 24 lip color 

​so I belong to influenster.com where you do tasks and earn points to help qualify for free samples. Yes completely free all you do is post to social media you honest opinion of the product, and you guessed it. I got lipsticks, not any lipsticks but Super Stay 24 lip color.

Yes, any product that says 24 hours seems to good to be true, but let me tell you I have tried many lip items that state they can last all day and none have made it until now. Yes you read that right it lasted all day and night. 

Now I’m a stay at home Mama of 3, which means three times as many boo-boo’s to kiss, sneaking snacks so I don’t starve, gulping so much coffee and tea I should have stock in coffee beans and tea leaves. One less thing to worry about it amazing, the best part the colors it comes in. These two colors not only are super cute and flawless they come with their own lip balm that you can use over the color or on their own because it’s so moisturising. 

Don’t believe me here are some pictures I took over a two day period, some I have time stamped and the other one I just happened to sleep and woke up, and lips still looking fabulous. 

This photo is from sleeping in makeup, yes I know bad for my skin but it was a rough day.

If you’re looking for some free samples and want to check them out head an over to influenster.com and sign up.

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Where have I been?

Wow it’s been a while, why because three kids outnumber me and my brain is on Mama Brain function. But my son is almost a year and my oldest goes into kindergarten and our middle goes to preschool 3 times a week coming up. I have given my brain/sanity to three little beings who I love and adore. With that being said I haven’t gone any where but clearly had lost my mind, but it’s back and almost 90% functional. Many things have happened lately and I shall fill you in.

 

As you have guess I have three children running,walking and crawling around constantly, which means 3 times the messes and 3 times the clean up. But, I have adapted a new theory that has been put to the test repeatedly  (like my requests) that “it’s not my mess, not my clean up”. At first I let my girls room go, I didn’t pick up a single item, I would drag my feet and scoot a path so I could be away the clean clothes. About a week after every item was out the girls complained that their room was to dirty to play in, “not my mess, not my clean up”, but I told them I would help only for big items the rest was up to them. I was always given every excuse in the toddler (big girls) book, my favorite was ‘My knees are to tired’, so I had them sit and clean up. I have even used this as a learning experience for when they would get a job, (we have all been there) I told them that if they do it now then they can relax after and enjoy a movie. It’s amazing how their attitude changed once they realized there was in fact something worth working towards. It did take a bit for the room to get done, so I gave them a bonus, popcorn because sometimes life gives you extra.

 

And, while teaching my daughters about responsibilities our son started to help pick up. Now I never start teaching kids about cleaning until they are almost 2 but I’m not going to stop someone from learning, also he wants to so badly to be just like his big sister’s. I do correct bad behavior around 1 year old so the they don’t go digging in the trash can or playing with plug-ins  (I have plug covers no worries, FYI dollar tree has some baby proofing stuff), or pulling out our plants  (my poor aloe plant). But no matter how much we try to teach our children, they always have their own agenda and their own way of doing things.

So now with 3 slightly independent children shuffling about and having numerous toys and gates and safety items on almost everything (mostly dangerous things), I have noticed that I seem to has some personal time. Which means I can finally add myself to the list of things/people to take care of and I’m happy about it. Granted it’s sad that my tiny baby boy is no longer tiny and we can tell he will be the big little brother, he doesn’t need me as much so I’m able to put more time and effort into everything and anything.

So basically, I went from having my hands very full (let’s me honest over spilling), not being able to keep a schedule to calm, somewhat organized getting back into the swing of things. And I AM HAPPY!

Until next time me friends.

Mommy Mayhem

First of new year’s resolutions are for the young and silly. It’s called growing up and changing for the better, so put on your laundry day underwear and suck it up buttercup.

My son old enough that he can chill in a play yard or an exer-saucer and be happy as long as he can see me, he is fine. So yesterday’s to do list went great. Got the items done and a wee bit more, awesome feelings all day and night.

Today was murder to get anything done. I don’t know what happened. No judgement for this but the kids and I are finally taking down Christmas decorations and its so hard when you’re the only adult. Christmas is usually my husband’s holiday but he wasn’t feeling it so I took over. Granted it wasn’t as great as what he does but we needed the tree and stockings, so I did the basics. And it seems I’m taking it down with my little helpers who don’t really help. Sad to say only the ornaments and some garland are down but I have no clue what stuff goes into what box. So I’m winging it like nobody’s business and I know come Christmas it’s gonna be a shit show but oh well, not my complete fault. The worst part is now I have to box everything up and Tetris those stupid boxes into our/his shed between other random pass carp we collect.

What the fuck happened today? I woke up with my mantra (I will be refreshed! I will be happy! I’ll get shit* done! *Or your favorite bad word too.) The tree wiped out any momentum I had, the kids kept pulling out ornaments that I just put into boxes with bubble wrap that they keep popping. When I sent them to their room the girls destroyed that after we spent so long cleaning it yesterday and to make it even better poured liquid soap on their beds and floor. Where the soap came from, I’ll never know. To top off the chaos of today everyday single time I had my son asleep in his crib the girls would scream bloody murder or scream cry about nothing and wake him up. The sprinkles on my chaos sundae was nobody listens to me.

But I should just get use to it, the never ending story as an adult. Clean houses aren’t happening with three kids and two dogs, why do I keep trying? Because I’m Mom, nobody wants to admit it but I’m needed all the time everyday and I chose to be happy.

I will wake refreshed.
I will wake happy.
I will get shit done!

Tomorrow I’ll try again, just because today was hard tomorrow might be easier. Tomorrow is a new day with new adventures, and maybe a glass of wine or two to help the day go smoother.

Three for me, thankful for plenty

When I was younger I had a plan, an actual life plan. What eight year old has a life plan, a real life plan. I wanted to be a married at twenty-one so I could drink at my wedding, pop out two kids a boy and girl before I was twenty-five and have a cat and a dog. Well my life plan changed when I got older and discovered not just any man would be good enough for my life plan.

I’m freshly thirty and my life plan is complete with some extras. I have two wonderful amazingly smart girls (I know everyone says that but it’s quite impressive many days), a beautiful happy baby boy (who is four months old and already trying to rollover and sit up), two dogs black labs (one is a half lab and something else and both are rescued), two catfish in a fifty gallon tank and a wonderful husband who loves me for me.

Now for the odd news, I never actually gave birth to my children. My body wouldn’t go into labor (which is fine, being told in my late teens/early twenties that getting pregnant might be hard) and having c-sections would be safest for my babies, but could give me health problems if I have many children. Which led my husband and I to the talk of how many kids we want. Three seemed to be the answer, three children. I never had any other dream in life but to be a Mom, that was my ambition in life: MOTHERHOOD.

I got my dream three times over, but then came the other talk birth control or get my tubes tied. I chose getting my tubes tied, by I what I mean is we. I had this discussion with my husband because it’s not just my life it’s our life, and he asked me what else did I want to do in life. Pop out and chase toddler’s the rest of my life or do something else I may like just as much. And for once I had a minor dream, something I love but not as much as being a Mom but nothing will ever come close to my love of being a Mom.

So for me three is plenty, three kids that is. For the rest in life is just extras and perks that came with Motherhood, and I cherish every moment I have. I have accomplished parts my life plan and I am grateful for it.

Sleep well my friends and remember for what makes you happy.

Memories I chose to forget

There are memories that people choose to remember, happy times with family and friends, new adventures that help you discover who you really are deep inside. But the mind is an amazing thing, it can trick you into being brave and something I find useful block or forget bad memories. That is what this blog is about, memories that I had chosen to forget either I chose to forget these or my life is finally full of happiness that my mind has filed these past experiences in a box way in the back of my mind. Either way here comes a dark stack of memories that have come to light even just for a moment so people know they are not alone.

Relationships are hard work is a lie that people tell each other because they don’t want to face the fact that it is the end of their love life temporarily. I always thought that it was hard work that got you ahead in life I foolishly applied this to all my romantic relationships, this was horribly wrong. Love is easy, trust is hard that is what makes life hard.

I start all relationships completely trusting people, I will always trust people when I meet them but it is up to them to not break that trust because once it’s broken it’s almost impossible for me to trust them again. My husband found me after someone had broken me mentally and slightly physically. This was a dark phase in my life and I see why my mind keeps it in the back of my mind behind all my happy memories, this is a toxin and it must not be mixed in with my current happy life. Why destroy happiness with a dark toxin that will take me down a dark path that in turn will destroy all I have now.

Without getting into much detail about things I can say that I thought little of myself only due to my significant other saying things that would make me question things that I used to do that made me happy. They would say things to control me and I didn’t even know it, the worst part is everyone around me noticed and would confront me about it, but all I did was make excuses. That is not love. They would call me at work to make sure I was in fact at work, many times they would drive by multiple times and even come in and sit at my job as if they were protecting their property, I was property to them not a human being with feelings and emotions but an object that was theirs. This is not love.

Looking back I noticed that their family questioned why I was with their child, and yet again I made excuses. I would always tell their family that you can’t pick and choose parts of someone that you love you love them completely or not at all, what a fool I was. Everyone was trying to get me to open my eyes about this person and I ignored all the signs, I blinded myself because I thought it was love. It was not love, it was toxic. Their own family knew what was going on and tried over and over to open my eyes and I refused their help by always making excuses.

The biggest problem was between work and college I was paying their way in life, I was their money line and took care of them. That is not love, this was control and I was not in control. I also turned to alcohol to numb myself sometimes when even I didn’t believe my own excuses about our relationship. But one day after hanging around my family, all my family and my significant other didn’t come to yet again another family thing that I cared about I didn’t make any excuses to anyone, not even me. That was the last straw, I was done.

No more apologies from them for accidentally hitting my arm to hard, or grabbing my wrist to tight. No more excuses for their bad attitude everyday because their life is so hard doing nothing. No more making me feel bad for hanging out with my friends because I haven’t seen my friends in months. No more putting myself last when I was never even consider top ten in their life. No more checking in at work to see if I was actually there. No more of letting someone control my life. It is my life and I can choose who I want in my life and what I want to do.

So when I can home that night to my apartment that I paid all the bills for mine and theirs I said I am done. They seemed confused and I said congrats you are no single and I am going home to my parents. The moment those words left my mouth my body felt to much lighter. I felt a warmth spread over my body like a blanket fresh from the dryer wrapped around me. I packed some things and left, my parents were surprised to see me so soon again, and I told them what I did they asked if I wanted to talk about it and I said I just want to move on and put all this behind me. They never asked me again if I wanted to talk about it, I never did again till a few days ago with my cousin. She told me she sort of knew something wasn’t right in that relationship, I wasn’t really shocked that she knew. I was more shocked of how blind I made myself to ignoring everyone’s help.

After something so dark and toxic you may wonder how was I able to find actual true love. Well my husband never gave up, even when I said that I wasn’t looking for love and that I was dating a few people. Yes actual dating nothing sexual, well some sexual after all I was free and put myself first and I am human. I had to be single and put myself first for a while to discover who I was without someone controlling me. It was amazing to discover things in life again, it was more amazing to see how much I loved myself. I had to learn that all over again before I could actually love another person again. This takes time and I had to do this alone and sometimes with friends because surrounding myself with love and happiness is the best way to heal. And to my dismay my husband never gave up, he friended me on myspace when it was the main site to be on, then later he would visit me at work and bring me flowers just because they made him think of me, and finally he would text me just to say hi and that he missed me. Granted I have never been wooed like this before ever I just knew deep down that I should give my husband a chance and I’m glad I did. He waited so patiently for me to be ready to open my broken and beaten heart for love once again. That is love.

My husband still to this day woos me, granted the gifts are smaller and not expensive but the fact he thinks of me often is amazing and I think of him often. We have three children all close in age, two girls and a boy they are a reminder that happiness is easy. Love is easy when you are with the right person, life becomes easier, everything is easier when it is the right person who you share your life with. If you’re wondering if we fight we do, but it is nothing ever serious. More like who ate the last cookie or who keeps stealing all the covers, my personal favorite is those silly scrunched faces we make at each other because we are silly and know not to take life to seriously. That is love, being ourselves completely and not worrying if they will still love us for showing our truest self. Happiness and love, that is easy. That is life.

2 girls sharing space,sisters

Yes I am a stay at home mother and yes I am pregnant with our third child a son. Our house only has three bedrooms so our girls share a room with bunk beds that they picked out. Being the smart parents that we are (not feeling it sometimes) we did the stacked thing instead of both on the floor, because having some playing space is important for Mom to keep her sanity (3 kids, hahahaha that’s gone). Which means that they share not only living space, they share closets and toys, and now there is two dressers in their room.

Sharing space is hard, this I know but my girls seem to invade my space often and I love it. Today they have converted the bottom bunk into a cave, which means all of their blankets that I have folded neatly and put away are now tucked into the bunk bed to make it dark. They also have moved all of their stuffed animals from both bunks into one and are giggling away. This happens more than often, I am just glad that they no longer empty out their dresser or closest because folding blankets is easier and quicker than clothes.

It is Wednesday and tomorrow the girls sleep over at Grammie Pammie and Pops for the weekend so that Friday their little brother can be born. They are helpful and excited right now, but I wonder what is going to happen when he is on the outside of Mommy. They can share space with each other they are after all sisters and only 16 months apart, but their little brother is will be three years younger than my youngest daughter.

And now space sounds like we need more, time to log off and start lunch and give them a small break from playing and destroying their room, it’s a PB&J day with more laundry and dishes. I love my life and  love my family.

Why I love when my husband is gone

Let’s first start off by saying that my husband works for a refinery and sometimes he has to work night shift, which is hard but there are perks. But first some info about my childhood, my father was in the US ARMY and I was brought up with him gone sometimes and this was normal. My mother made it seem like this was normal, we had activities and fun things to do so that my brother and I had no idea that this was not a normal thing that all families do.

So I have become accustomed to not having my other half around all the time, I believe this also makes our relationship stronger. I have the time to miss my husband, I have the gift of missing those annoying habits that would usually drive me crazy. This is something I learned from my Mom, time away from someone makes you realize how much you care for them.

Granted, we have two wonderful little girls and our son due in seven days. I know that they too will understand that time away from the people you love will make the relationship stronger. But the biggest thing I cherish the most is time to do what I want when I want, like my nails before bed, facial or my favorite home hair care routine. It also strengthens the bond I share with my kids.

Tonight my husband is off for a wedding and I get the bedroom to myself tonight. I also get to do a home spa evening because falling asleep is hard to do when you have a watermelon growing in your tummy. So our girls got to go to bed at ten pm, which is way past bedtime and when we have to share a bed in the morning like every morning, there will be plenty of space. We co-sleep because I like that it keeps us close and with my husband being the only on working any time with Mom and Dad is well worth it, and in the winter it is amazing to have so much body heat on cold days.

Well for now I have to rise out the coconut oil from my hair and the oatmeal face mask off, then after shower with a mint body scrub that I have been saving in the One Day I Will Use This Drawer that is filled to the top of products that I save for evenings alone for some pampering myself. I just wish that I saved some candy to snack on or something yummy to spoil myself with even more. But tomorrow I see my other half and get to hear that wonderful I look, and how refreshed I seem and I know that he knows that I spoil myself while he is gone because it is the simple things in life that we treasure. Plus it is nice that he is the one that puts things in my pampering drawer so that one day I get spoil myself.

And in case everyone is wondering, yes I miss him terribly and wished he wasn’t gone from me ever, but that is life and time apart does make the heart grow fonder. Besides being in each others life from eleven years old to now and being married for five years that is 15 plus years of being around each other and I know there are many many more years to come of annoying each other.

I am not missing just Mommy Busy

Hey everyone I am so sorry that I haven’t blogged in such a long time. I don’t have any excuse besides that life has gotten busier due to little ones growing up and wanting to be I the world more. With that being said keep reading and see what has kept me away for the internet lately. (Almost like those annoying Christmas letters families send out, just not as bragging like. Hopefully.)
Our oldest daughter wanted to be in the world more and that means that she no longer needed Momma to teach her things, she requested to go to school. It broke my heart because that means my little baby girl has in fact left the baby phase of life and is now a little person. This fun new phase in life made me so proud and at the same time so sad, she has mastered using the bathroom and quoting one of my favorite Adam Sandler movies she can wipe her own ass. All she struggles with is stopping what she is doing and go to the bathroom, thankfully there are plenty of kids show that cover teaching kids to stop playing and go potty. The one that Gabby quotes for real is Daniel Tiger which is a very cute song and I am thankful she only needs to be reminded about 10% of the time.
Our current youngest daughter is fighting being potty trained however she will sit on the potty about 25% of the time and use it correctly. She has also asked to go to preschool and I am hoping that if I say yes she will be more inclined to learn how to be a big girl in the bathroom. The only reason she needs to be slightly potty trained is the preschool requires that kids are inclined to at least alert the teachers they have to go. The main reason I believe she doesn’t want to learn is….
We are currently pregnant with child number three and it is a BOY! Which is very exciting for us, we weren’t really aiming for a specific gender of child we just wanted one more kid. Which are big changes for our family of four. He is due in September and at the same time hopefully both girls will be in preschool which means we will be out of the house not just twice a week but five days a week.
I would be able to blog and vlog when I am out of the house but my girls have damaged not one but both of my iPad which are out for repairs. The cost is what is keeping me from updating all my social accounts temporarily. But with my husband working the turnaround at the local refinery and warmer weather coming up we will have more experiences to write and talk about. Just a heads up there is a pretty large chance there will be more baby stuff and maybe not so much of what I call adult things.
So thanks for catching up with me and I hope that soon I will be blogging more now that my kids are more active and not so dependent on me, sad but happy mile stones in our family of fun.

Time wasted on nothingness

Nothing seemed so important to me than my cell phone. It was everything clock, contact with people and boredom fixer. All of us read about how technology is sucking away our lives and we don’t even notice it. There were plenty of media coverage and blogs that stated how we depend on our technology so much more now that everything is in arms reach. What happened to face to face conversations and the old fashion letters that we use to look forward to? Many of us have traded a large part of our time and connection to another human being for something that is instant and seemed like it helps our friendships.

I decided that on Sunday January 25 that I would turn my cell phone off, I didn’t cancel my account I simply powered down my cell. And guess what, I have more time for things and spend more time with my family. Face to face time seemed almost new to me, I realized that I am in fact missing out on important things in my family’s life. It has only been about three days and I can say that yes it was hard not to log onto all my social media sites and see what people were doing. But today I noticed that I just don’t care. Many of the social sites I belong to were always full of people venting out their issues, calling out someone who did them wrong, or some silly link to another website for something that they considered funny. But I think about it now and really it is a media site full of people who are giving up on real relationships for ones that satisfies them instantly. I am tired of that, I had many ‘friends’ and ‘followers’ on my social media sites but I only really knew about 10 of them personally.

Now I know going cell phone less seems like a challenge but I do carry it still for safety reasons, however, it sits in my purse shut off but charged. Being able to get a hold of people instantly was hard to give up the first day or so but today I enjoy the silence of my house. I spend time with my girls, clean my house and am able to remember who I was before that little machine took over a part in my life. I am happy with my choice to be without my cell for a week. I don’t really care that Sunday is coming up and I will be turning it back on, but my new rule will be to power down that little sucker at 6 pm every day. But I know for a fact that just like social media not a lot of people would message my cell phone to see what I am doing, because nobody cares. Like on social media sites nobody really cares they just give the illusion that they care because it makes them feel better.

I have gone back to a schedule that I had before the cell phone was by my side. I have realized that I need to find my watch, but times seems to still pass as before, it would just help if I didn’t have to search for a clock to figure out the time. I actually watch television shows now; I pay attention and follow along. I caught myself watching a show that I thought I would never watch before because social media didn’t have any influence on my choice anymore. It didn’t matter if someone thought this show sucked or was boring, I like it. Without the constant opinions of others to sway how I make choices on what I want to watch or wear I am able to be the individual I was growing up. I just don’t care if someone dislikes the shows I like, I don’t care if they are negative. These so called friends aren’t in my life now because neither they nor I made a step towards the friendship.

I have time for me, I can knit if I want, or bake or my favorite just sit and drink my tea and look around at my life and find myself completely satisfied that I have in fact accomplished half of my dream of being a Mom. The dream it not done yet, for I am still living it.

Cleaned my first fish

Let me start off by saying that no I am not doing this just for ‘readers’ I fish (sometimes) and I figured that maybe I should know how to clean what I catch, it it is ever bigger than what my husband calls ‘bait fish’. I have caught the total of 20ish bait fish and no keepers.

First off, the smell. Oh wow! I can change diapers that let’s just say cheek to covered cheek, shovel after the dog does his thing and field dress a rooster. So those smells don’t both me at all, but fish that has been in fridge for a day or so…..WOW.

But once I got over the smell I had to do a couple rounds of jumping up and down and shaking out my limbs to pump myself up, then you have to grab the fish. EWWWWWW! But that was the smallest eww of the day. Did you know that you have to remove the head and insides? I didn’t quite know that, and I had to do it. Which I did, but the gross factor stayed around during the whole time during the first fish.

Did she just say first fish? Yes, yes I did. I not only did one first but I did four. I did three silvers and 1 king, by the third filet (side being removed) I was doing pretty good. I sort of started doing my own ways of it, granted the foundation was what my husband taught me. But I am told that there are many ways to clean a fish and they vary from person to person and fish to fish.

All I know is that now I want to get my own knife (pink of course), maybe those tables that are slightly curved so your not fighting gravity so much. And maybe next time I won’t clean them on top of the stove, there was major clean up afterwards and my kitchen smelt of bleach and soap.

But I am proud that I now can clean a fish, granted I seem to have some major skill for removing the ribs while taking the filets off the spine. Not sure that I will ever get use to the smell but all that matters is that now we have a way to stock up our freezer and I can help.

This all happened yesterday but I am still happy as a clam that I set out to learn something new and different (mostly dirty) and mastered it. Now if I could just get more free time to fish. But I love hanging out with my girls and they also like to fish, would you believe that they catch keepers and I don’t?!