Body after baby, what I miss

So you should know by now that I had children, yes, plural as in two. And I love my kids dearly, I wouldn’t have life any other way. But my body has gone though something that has changed its shape and size. I am working out to tighten my tummy, and yes it is jiggly due to having kids 16 months apart. Clearly not enough time between kids for my body to heal and go back to normal.

Clearly gravity is winning and it seems as if my body has thrown in the white flag of surrender. It has been 20 months after my second daughter and my body is not changing anymore. My waist is getting smaller slowly, like turtles walking through peanut butter slow but it’s working there. I have cut my food intake down to about half of what I would eat, which includes snacks. Snacking was my favorite part of being pregnant, man did that stupid bitch come bite me back. And hard. I use my husbands bow-flex when I can figure out how to work that med-evil device. I swear it is better for holding the clothing baskets than to use, but I do use it. And that machine is the devil, because it laughs and laughs at me attempt to use it. Clearly this machine was made for men and men only. That should be put on the label, and it should be the first thing listed then how to use the machine. Bow-flex of hell I am no longer your friend. You shall now and forever hold the laundry baskets.

And my butt and thighs are not wanting to join in, but I will be changing that soon. I have always thought my ass was my best body part besides my boobs. But no gravity is now your friend and those pants that help shape your butt and thighs are my friend. Yes, I have sadly become that mom, spanks and corsets and what ever else that is invented to hold your body in the place it use to be, are now my friends. And, I need at least a five hour heads up if my husband wants sex, don’t want him to feel the marks from my hidden helpers. But sometimes he sees them and smiles, I know he loves my body before, during and after kids, but I am only okay with it.

The worst offender are my boobs! They have disappeared into my torso and are staying hidden until I am assuming till hell freezes over. But many women go under the knife to make themselves have a more womanly figure before kids, I just am thinking a 35th birthday gift. But knowing myself I would have a million better uses for money. I know one day my body will be how I want it, and I will be happier but for now I will be okay with my body and long for the days when I was beating gravity and had the spare time to go to the gym, go for a run and have time to myself. Now just to go get milk I have to pack a diaper bag for two girls, my purse, and god knows what else I will need.

Motherhood I feel is much worse then puberty.

Why I love co-sleeping with my family

Many families are not big on co-sleeping with their kids, I don’t know why but when I ask them I hear mostly that they need their space. Well then they shouldn’t have had kids, kids are the opposite of space. When deciding to have kids I knew that there were things that I would have to give up, the big one would be space then privacy. Children are a huge decision to give up everything you loved about being alone and being able to take time to do what ever you wanted. Children are truly the best gifts that I was ever given. With that being said I will let you in on why I co-sleep with my family, even though my husband says he doesn’t like it (ends up snuggling with the girls the most).

When in the hospital my child was close to me in that little plastic type holder thing maybe about 10% of the time. Either they were snuggled with daddy or with me, whether it was feeding or sleeping my kids were never far from me. So it made enough sense that their bassinet would be by my bedside close that I could feed them with no problem, which ended up mostly with me falling asleep with them in my arms or next to me. So when each child was moved into their cribs in their own rooms a slight panic swept over me, baby monitors or not, I did not like the fact my kids were not in arms reach. But I could hear them breathing, mostly snoring and tooting though out the night and I knew that they were safe.

But as all children do they would cry and make noise and end up in our bed feeding or cuddling till they were content, and I could have put them back but I couldn’t. More of I wouldn’t, I cherished the moments we shared while they were small. Holding onto my finger to keep me close, or touching me with any arm or leg if I rolled out of reach. My favorite thing was when they would be laying sideways between my husband and myself to make sure we both were there and that we didn’t go far. This is when my husband started to complain that space was fleeting in our cal. king bed. Trust me there is plenty of room still to this day with all four of us in bed.

The hardest part happened when our oldest was no longer in a crib but ‘big girl’ bed (we removed one side of the crib). The first few nights were mostly her coming in our room checking on us. Nothing in a million-zillion years would make me leave our house without our kids. The first few weeks were hard and included a lot of co-sleeping but I didn’t mind, my children seek comfort and safety in me and I gladly show them.

But I know there will come a time in life where sleeping in their parents beds won’t happen anymore, and I hope those days never come but I know they will. But until then I will co-sleep with my girls and cherish every moment that they need me. For one day I will no longer be needed and I will long for the days where I was the only thing they needed to be happy. With my oldest turning three in December and my youngest turning two in April I think I have many more co-sleeping nights ahead of me and I look forward to each and every one.

And, even though my husband complains I know that when we stop co-sleeping he will miss is as much as I do.